YOUR HEART

I had a friend come to me with an issue~his marriage.  He asked me if I had any idea on how his life had gotten so out of control, so overwhelming, and why he was filled with so much guilt.  I smiled as he asked (which he didn't like~but I couldn't help myself, I watched his life spiral out of his control for months).  He told me he had so much anger towards his wife and when I asked why, his response surprised him, because of the guilt I feel.  Hmm, I said sounds like a personal issue that you're trying to get rid of by blaming someone else.  I asked him why the guilt?  Friend:  Because I envy the way she loves me and I seem to be so superficial.  Before I go any further let me give you a little history on the past few months.  (Bet you'll see what I saw).

His wife was pregnant (again #4 I believe) and he was so proud in the beginning.  The thought of another child motivated him and he wanted to get his degree, a better paying job, etc.  That's as far as that thought went.......a thought.  Eventually, he became very self-defeating, couldn't do anything right, didn't give a damn about anything, and then into a very self absorbed behavior, neglected his wife, his kids, yet all along his wife continued to love him and look out for him.  It was time for the baby and she became ill, because of the state of mind he was in, his fear pushed him even further into his own created selfishness and his wife called on her mother to help her.  He told me at this time, an old girlfriend from over ten years ago contacted him via social media.  He was flattered, happy, and seem motivated again.  This has to mean something doesn't it? he asked me.  Of course it does, I reassured.  It means that you have reached the ultimate low of self-absorbed. It is a very, very negative and dangerous place you have allowed your mind to go and the "so called" happiness you feel, will be so short lived.  What's the dangerous part he asked?  The dangerous part is you could lose everything that is near, dear and what people strive to find their entire life=unconditional love.  I explained, you see, she wouldn't have come into your life, if you had your priorities straight and were taking care of what you have and what you profess to love, for when you live in gratitude and love, negativity searches for other negative people.  A strong confident woman doesn't look to another's man to try to take away, for that is forbidden.  And a true, strong, respectful man wouldn't allow it!!  What should I do, he asked?  I used the old saying I love, if the grass looks greener in someone else's yard, water your own grass!  But just like a drug, the quick high he felt from having someone else say nice things to him, compliment him, etc, had bit and I told him to be very careful and to call me whenever he needed until he could pull himself out of the darkness he was surrounded in.  He nodded, reassured me he would never do anything like that.

So..................do you think he called me???  {Stay tuned for the rest of the story}.