Who do you give your time to?
I find it interesting who I give my time to and why. I select people that I think are on the same page as me, as time goes on, I find they aren't even in the same book.
I have learned through experience that some people impersonate understanding, compassion or concern, all along trying to convince me they have my best interest at heart. But yet when the moment calls for them to demonstrate these qualities through action or behavior, then I experience abandonment, rejection betrayal.....along with insensitivity and neglect.
I realize that when this happens, the experience defines them not me (except for the part of me that allowed them access to me). I also have learned that in order for me to gain understanding, I must continue to open my heart to others, that is, if I want to stop hurting. We shut our hearts and shut others out thinking we are protecting ourselves, when we are on guard we are defensive. We become unapproachable and unavailable, we look for and often find ulterior motives in everything and everyone.
There is no way I can heal when I am shut down. In order to heal I have to share the pain and open my heart. In order to avoid the impersonators, I must move slowly respect my bottom line of relationships and realize that each of us have different experiences and different definitions of the same experience.
To test if someone is on the same page? Are their words congruent in action? If not? Another impostor, another impersonator of concern. I will say no the impersonators, but I must say yes to people who are genuine.
If you find yourself receiving miscommunication, misinterpretation with someone else, these are indications that the person is impersonating and not only will there be misunderstanding, they will probably blame you for it.
-97
I have learned through experience that some people impersonate understanding, compassion or concern, all along trying to convince me they have my best interest at heart. But yet when the moment calls for them to demonstrate these qualities through action or behavior, then I experience abandonment, rejection betrayal.....along with insensitivity and neglect.
I realize that when this happens, the experience defines them not me (except for the part of me that allowed them access to me). I also have learned that in order for me to gain understanding, I must continue to open my heart to others, that is, if I want to stop hurting. We shut our hearts and shut others out thinking we are protecting ourselves, when we are on guard we are defensive. We become unapproachable and unavailable, we look for and often find ulterior motives in everything and everyone.
There is no way I can heal when I am shut down. In order to heal I have to share the pain and open my heart. In order to avoid the impersonators, I must move slowly respect my bottom line of relationships and realize that each of us have different experiences and different definitions of the same experience.
To test if someone is on the same page? Are their words congruent in action? If not? Another impostor, another impersonator of concern. I will say no the impersonators, but I must say yes to people who are genuine.
If you find yourself receiving miscommunication, misinterpretation with someone else, these are indications that the person is impersonating and not only will there be misunderstanding, they will probably blame you for it.
-97
Comments
Post a Comment